I feel lost
Ever had the feeling like, the whole world could break down on you?
Indeed, I believe that such may have occurred to all of us, with no one exempted from it.
But, ever had taken a closer look on why we do feel so?
I could enumerate hundreds of reasons, but that is not what I am trying to imply with this post.
My emphasis is about how I am feeling at this very point in time. So deep down vulnerable. I accept, that for a matter of fact, this sounds odd and exaggerated; as my set of words seem mysterious as well. Now, luminous at it seems, the darkest tempest has risen from death again, and as a result; I’m disturbed, NOT MENTALLY of course, but emotionally.
I don’t know where to place myself in one`s very special life. I don’t know if our “us” right now makes some sense. I can’t feel the special feeling I used to feel before. What could be the very reason for this event to have taken place?
Probably, it could be the recent meet that we had. In which, I got disappointed, totally. I admit, I had teased her once, just one single time what I was always teasing her. As she suddenly came to mind to topic about 2 persons, I never ever wanted to hear about, most especially coming out from her own very mouth. Indeed, I recall; she said that she would never ever like to hear one of the 2 guy`s name that she has mentioned, but those words seem to be buried among the death, as apparently, yesterday was not the only time she did mention those names.
Now, here I am.. So confused.. So lost.. Why does she keeps on discussing about those people? Are her feelings not still rid of them? It’s like a sharp sickle cutting the edges of my brain, as I am lost again this very moment with words to represent the torment and poignant feeling I am feeling. 
Well, indeed there’s still one thing to consider and one very thing that I have as consolation, her friend [who is my friend too] had told me, that she is proud of having me, which I do.. have never ever felt.. yet..
March 6th, 2008 at 2:39 pm
Gagawin ko ang komentaryong ito ng kabaliktaran ng ulat mo.
Di lang sa lingwaheng ginagamit, saka na rin sa nais kong ipaabot na mensahe sa mga mambabasa mo, at sayo mismo bes.
Una sa lahat, nagpapasalamat ako at nakikiramay ka sa sakit ng puso ko kaninang iilang minuto lang nakalipas. Ok na kami ngayon, salamat ulit.
Ngayon, ukol naman po sa iyong ulat.
Wag ka po masyadong mag iisip ng masama, di nakakabuti yan. Dapat lagi mo titingnan ang isang bagay sa positibong mukha, ika nga, malay natin, [sigurado ako nito] kung anu man ang meon sa inyo, hindi yan maibabalik pa. magsaya ka sa piling nyo isa’t isa. alam ko bes, mahal ka nun, di ka naman sasagutin kung hindi dba?
oh bes, wag ka na masyado iisip ng masama hah? alam ko, medyo marami na nga syang nasasabi tungkol sa mga people na ayaw mo marinig, na sinabi rin nya mismo na hindi na nya banggitin, pero, dude, kasama na ang mga tao na yon sa KAHAPON nya, at hindi maalis yan. ika nga, di lang sya ang may ganun, dba? pati na rin ikaw. pero, oo. isang magandang bagay, ay hindi mo ito binabahagi sakanya, na kahit paano naman tlga ay maari mapainggitan nya.
March 6th, 2008 at 2:43 pm
naku, at napindot ko ung pang papasa ng komentaryo ni hindi pa ako tapos!
oh bes, kaya natin lusotan ang kahit anu mang problema, nandito lang ako para sayo, at di magbago yan. matalik na kaibigan, hanggang kailan man. DBA? bale, kung nais mo hindi maging malungkot si ako, sana di ka na rin malungkot. alam ko, yakang yaka mo ito, mapawala sa isip nya ang kung sino mang lalake na nadaanan nya sa buhay nya. ika nga, “ang mga bagay bagay na hindi sinasabi ay maari maging dahilan ng matitinding away” o sa ingles pa “small things unsaid, do often, always end up big”.
mag uusap kayo ng personalan tungkol sa mga bagay na iyon, masmabuti yun!
Tska narin, ung tungkol sa tinanong mo ukol sa pagbabalik nang lalake na yon? ung joseph ba?
wag ka mag aalala. mahal ka nya. di ka nya iiwan para balkan yon, wag maging negatibo.
†bes cessâ€
March 6th, 2008 at 3:01 pm
Thank you very much for your comment bes.
But how can’t I?
I’m sorry if I made you feel worried about me right now.
I’m alright, promise.
I may just hope that she won’t get wind about this article, I’m ashame of myself right now that I am always seeing everything negatively
When everything I do goes wrong?
March 6th, 2008 at 3:01 pm
Thank you for being there for me
I really appreciate it.
BHEBHESHIES FOREVER